Tag Archives: relationships

5 Unbelievable Facts Men Should Know About Valentines Day

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It’s that time of the year again nice guys. Valentine’s Day is a few days away and well over 60% of us (assuming you are in the US) will be celebrating it. Chances are if you have a girl you fancy then you have already planned the day out, but is this holiday really all about love and romance? The five major facts discussed in today’s post may have you second guessing why you celebrate of this historical day.

Men Spend Upwards of $150 Or More On Their Dates.

When it comes to spending, the average man will spend over $150 in meals, gifts, and entertainment on the object of their affection. Unfortunately for this is also about a weeks worth of pay for the common male. A lot of women would argue “What’s wrong with having a day where a man pays for dinner and gifts?” The problem is this is a daily occurrence for all men that are currently involved or looking to be involved with a woman in which they are attracted.

Can you imagine spending $80 to $200 dollars on dinner and gifts for a lousy “thank you”? Millions of guys have this experienced situation and continue to every year. Why? Simply because men feel obligated to do so on Valentines day other wise they are seen as cheap or unappreciative of women.

Women Not Only Want More But Expect More.

The average woman not only prefer but expects a gift after being treated to a nice dinner. If any of you guys reading this thought an expensive dinner was enough, think again!  Since we are in a society that coddles females, it’s only natural that women start to become self absorbed and feel entitled to the spoils of your labor.

Men Spend Double Than Women

On average women spend $70 dollars in gifts on valentines day. While it’s nice to have a woman spend their money on the man in their life, it’s a simple drop in the hat compared to male spending. Women expect their men to go big on this “day of love” however most women won’t reciprocate the generous gesture. Most women think that the promise of sex is their way of going big for their men, I’m here to tell you that is a stupid argument. If you have a dead bedroom, scheduled sex, or occasional sex then your relationship is in serious trouble and your woman is a live in prostitute. She’s exchanging material wealth for sex and you are a sap for falling for it.

Women Often Trade Partners On V-Day

Studies show 53% of women in the US would leave their boyfriends/husbands if they received a cheap or no gift for Valentines Day. Yes the majority of women are so vain that they can toss a relationship out the window over a simple gift. The unfortunate truth is this is common behavior, and most men can’t seem to wrap their heads around a woman who can easily cut ties with them and never look back. It’s very important for men to realize just how shallow the opposite sex can be.

Only 27% Of Women Actively Participate On V-Day

Remember when I said women will spend roughly $70 bucks on Valentines Day? Well 15% of those women spend it on themselves. Yes women will by roses, chocolates, and other nice things but over half of them are buying it for themselves. That means only 12% of women actually do anything for their partners on this day of “Love”. Again sex is not a gift or a treat and if that is how it’s being used in your relationship it’s time to reevaluate your relationship.

You might be asking yourself just how did this holiday which is suppose to be about love and romance turn into a glorified cash grab. Well there are many reasons, but the most prevalent is that men in general allow and tolerate it. If you find yourself more obligated to buy gifts rather than genuinely wanting to then you are celebrating this holiday the wrong way. Valentines day is a day when it is traditional to send a card, often anonymously, to a person one is romantically involved with or attracted to. Now it’s become nothing but a shameless money grab for companies and a mini Christmas for women and the men seem to be the big suckers in the equation.

Whether you’ve made plans or are debating doing something for that special someone make sure she’s worth the time and effort. It can be hard to tell but you can start by reading No More Mr.Nice Guy and going from there. I guarantee it will be an enlightening read.

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The Ultimate Man’s Guide To Modern Hypergamy

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It’s no secret men have the damnedest time truly understanding the inner workings of the female psyche. Guys are taught from an early age that being nice, supportive, and friendly will almost certainly land them a faithful mate. However this behavior has only landed the vast majority of men in the category of creep while seemingly opposite behavior actually works. Which leaves nice guys everywhere wondering how exactly does a woman choose her partners. Well my friends we have all the answers in today’s post but first I must warn all who read this. The truth is not pretty, it can be extremely harsh and ultimately painful. Never the less it’s nothing compared to the pain of living a lie for years.

I’d like to introduce you to a term that the uninitiated have probably never heard of, the term is called “Hypergamy”. Hypergamy is defined as the act of marrying someone wealthier or of higher status than yourself. While not gender specific the term is more times than not pointed towards women because status and wealth make up vital parts of their total attraction to males.  Think of hypergamy as a giant tree that every woman must climb, and every branch in that tree represents a male.

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  Illustration created with the help of Piktochart

As you can see as a man’s income increases so does the level of attraction from the women he interacts with. However this is only a basic understanding of hypergamy and most guys would dismiss this information without really thinking about it. So to help men truly understand this we will cover this down to it’s core. How and where it starts, your role in it, and even real world examples to learn from.

The Three Pillars of Hypergamy

Modern hypergamy is built on three pillars. One pillar is innate while the other two are taught as young girls mature into women. I’ll let the diagram below explain things more clearly.

three female traits of attract(1)  Illustration created with the help of Piktochart

By now you are probably starting to put two and two together. I can imagine the light bulb turning on as you travel back in time and analyze your past encounters with women. Maybe you realize why you were or weren’t so successful with them in high school. Better yet maybe you realize that those that aren’t up to a woman’s standard are considered creeps, perverts, and potential rapists but this is a topic for another day.

No Place To Go But Up

It’s important to keep in mind that once a woman has climbed to a certain height in the tree she absolutely will not climb down to a lower level. It should also be noted there are women that will do just about anything to secure their branch on that tree. Marriage and children are usually the most effective ways for a woman to secure a portion of wealth for men. When the relationship eventually goes sour the legal system will more often than not give a portion of the man’s wealth to the former wife.

Alimony and child support will keep the woman at their desired standard of living until they find the next eligible suitor. Make no mistake this is not isolated to those that are considered wealthy, this happens to men from all walks of life and levels of income.

Men Ultimately Lose In This System

Many men fall prey to this system and the real kicker is that it’s not widely spoken about. Well no need to fear because I am going to go over three mini case studies of the system at work.  Let’s take a look at our victims:

Dwight Howard: 29 year old profession NBA player. He’s got money, looks, and status which is something every woman is looking for. This man most likely has women throw themselves at him every hour of every day. Unfortunately this man has also managed to spawn 8 children in the span of 6 years between 6 different women. This is not the behavior of a man looking to start a family, this is a man that has been caught in the hypergamy trap…8 times.

Evander Holyfield: 52 year old retired professional boxer. 11 children with 9 different women, again not your typical family man behavior. Although it is the behavior of a wealthy bachelor that just happened to get caught and the reckless behavior has lost him over 300 million.

Calvin Murphy: 66 year old retired NBA player. He has 14 children with 9 different women need I say more here? No on plans to have this many children with so many different women, the amount of legal, alimony, and child support bills must be staggering for this former professional.

I think at this point it’s starting to sink in how the hypergamy system works. The real kicker is the fact these gentlemen are not even married to any of the women they have conceived these children with. This means love and companionship were not a factor and unfortunately that is how it is for most men that get sucked into the system. In a later post I will discuss the adverse effects that modern hypergamy and feminism have on males. Until then readers.

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Nice Guys : The Benjamin Franklin Effect

Nice guys! How do you get a woman in which you are attracted to like you? Do you give them lots of attention? Treat them out to dinner? Shower them with gifts? Always pay for the bill? How often have you gone that extra mile for someone only to have it blow up in your face later on? What if I told you there was a fool proof way to properly gauge a woman’s genuine affection for you without you putting yourself in too much of a compromising position? Well wish no more nice guys I have just that for you today. This technique is called “The Benjamin Franklin Effect” and is today’s topic of discussion. Today you are going to discover how to use this effect to your advantage and see whether the object of your affection is even worth your time.

So what is this effect and why should I care?

The Benjamin Franklin Effect (BFE) is a psychological finding that says that a person who has invested an effort into another person is more likely to invest even more into that same person. So what does this mean? Think about every time you’ve treated a woman you like out to dinner, paid the bill, gave her gifts. Your initial investment into that person will usually lead to another investment. Which means more dates, fancy gifts, or favors for that person in addition you becoming even more attracted to them.

How does this help me with women?

Glad you asked nice guy! Now that you know the principles of the B.F.E, you can now compare and contrast your level of investment and hers.  If you find yourself investing where your woman isn’t you know for a fact that her attraction to you isn’t there. This saves you a lot of wasted time, money, and energy in the dating game and can even help you land a real catch quicker.

The method isn’t difficult and you don’t even have to change your current approach. All you need to do is pay attention to her actions to gauge her level of investment. However nice guys I feel I must warn a few of you when it comes to effectively gauging a woman’s investment in you. In no way, shape, or form should you take any kind of physical contact as an investment. Hugs, pecks on the cheek and even sex can are often misconstrued by the gullible.

True investments are her picking up the tab, getting you a gift, or even taking you out… Basically anything you’d do for her. Now while you may say “Well these things aren’t exactly what a woman should do for me.” allow me to drag you out of the 1950’s and into the magical world of equality. There may be some extremely old fashion women out there (never met one but hey) however I doubt you’ll have one that likes you and not do something for you just because. Keep in mind the B.F.E isn’t only for gauging a woman’s affections to you but it also works on friendships, family, even work related relationships. It may just change the way you interact with everyone around you. Enjoy nice guys.

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Nice Guys : Pedestaling & You

Image Credit : zahodi-vgosti.ru

Hello nice guys(and gals), today I have a bit of a treat post for you. Truth be told this subject has been on my mind since last week and I knew instantly that it was going to be my next post’s topic. Today’s topic is about pedestaling, what it is, why you shouldn’t do it and how it changes you for the worse.

We’ve all placed women on a pedestal at some point in time of our lives, but the average nice guy has a terrible tendency to do this on a regular basis. Now I’m not saying it’s wrong to be polite to the opposite sex but that is where you should probably draw the line. In this post I have a strange story of how a nice guy takes putting women on a pedestal to the extreme. His post is rather long so I will be cutting it up for the sake of length.

Our nice guy’s name is Thomas, he’s been married to his wife for five years but as of late things haven’t been all rainbows and sunshine. Thomas says:

Several months ago, we were at a low point in our marriage. I was always busy with work and didn’t spend enough time with her. She felt that we were becoming distant. Many arguments arose and our love in one another felt like it was dwindling. At this time, I had to go away on a business trip for the weekend. My wife was alone at home, with our problems unresolved, and felt empty. She sought to ease the pain with alcohol at a local bar. In a moment of weakness, she had an affair with one of the patrons. Immediately, the next morning, she called me in tears and told me what happened. I felt anger, betrayal, and sorrow, and found myself unable to deal with the situation. I couldn’t talk my precious wife for days.

Immediately, the next morning, she called me in tears and told me what happened. I felt anger, betrayal, and sorrow, and found myself unable to deal with the situation. I couldn’t talk my precious wife for days.At this point, our marriage was greater than it’s ever been. However, a life changing issue has arisen in past two weeks. My wife had been feeling sick and no common medicine seemed to help. As time went by, she began to question if perhaps her ills were a result of a pregnancy. Sure enough, we went to her doctor and he confirmed that my wife was now 9 weeks pregnant. A realization hit the both of us that given the timing, there was no chance that I could be the father. Therefore the pregnancy was the result of my wife’s affair. The news broke her heart, and has left me in a state of depression. Once again, the feelings of anger and betrayal arose, leaving me distant from my wife.

At this point, I’m not sure what to do. Horrible thoughts of divorce and abortion enter my mind every day, and I’m trying my best to suppress them. I have fears that if we have this child together, I might resent him/her. The man my wife had the affair with was African American, while she and I are both Caucasian. This presents another fear as it would be clear to the child that I’m not the true father. How would I explain this to him/her? How would I explain this to others? Many thoughts keep passing through my mind, and I don’t know what to do. I feel alone, both emotionally and spiritually, and am questioning why God has allowed this to happen.”

Now dealing with a cheating partner is never easy, and it’s especially difficult being a nice guy. After reading Tom’s plea I can’t help but think he has this woman on a pedestal and no matter what she does wrong he can’t seem to knock her off. Notice how Tom seems to blame himself for his wife’s actions, and down right says he has no right to judge her! The reason I’m choosing Tom’s story is not because it’s the worst I’ve ever seen but the least extreme.

This poor guy is essentially apologizing for something his wife did to him and blaming it on everyone except the person who did the wrong doing. This is the end result of pedestaling guys, it completely destroys your perception and makes you lose focus of what’s going on around you. Let’s break down the effects to be clear guys.

The Causes:

What causes a guy to literally go blind(love is blind? see what I did there?) when in the presence of a woman? Great question, here are a few  answers.

  • Because you mom said so: In today’s world most parent/s teach their men in training to  always respect women and be nice to them.
  • Reward: For some strange reason nice guys think that if they trip over themselves with the sole purpose of making a woman happy that it will some how land them together. Guys it’s a lot more complicated than that and I promise in another post I’ll break it down for you.
  • Attention: Nice guys hate being ignored by someone that they like. It makes them sad, depressed, and mad at the world. They will do anything to get rid of those feelings.

The Effects:

  • She can’t do anything wrong: Having a woman on a pedestal makes you paint them in a perfect light, so perfect in fact that if she did anything wrong it wouldn’t even register in your brain. Enter Tom…
  • You are no longer important: You stop looking out for number one, and just look after her. Again this makes you lose focus on what is really going on in your relationship. Tom again…
  • Everything is your fault: If she leaves you or hooks up with someone else. Some how it turns out to be your fault and your fault alone.

In conclusion guys you really need to step back and see if you have adopted any of the symptoms above and if you have you seriously need to reverse the process before you end up like Thomas. A middle aged man that has been married to a wife that had an affair and is carrying a baby that isn’t his. Somewhere in Tom’s mind she didn’t do anything wrong, and he has no right to judge her. Nice guys this is your fate if you don’t stop putting women you are attracted to on a pedestal. Stay tuned for net week’s post as always comments, questions, complaints, concerns, and confessions are welcome!

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Nice Guys : The M.G.T.O.W Movement & You

Guy-on-Cliff

Over the past few decades it seems that men and women have been secretly waging war against the opposite sex and if you’ve been living under a rock like I have this post will be of news to you! Yes ladies and gentlemen the battle of the sexes have officially boiled over and nice guys around the world are officially done. Wait? What exactly do you mean “done”? They can’t just be “done”! Well apparently  nice guys and men in general have formed a movement called M.G.T.O.W (Men Going Their Own Way). In this post I’d like to go into detail about the movement, what it means, and most of all why it was created in the first place.

So one might ask ” What exactly has so many guys so pissed off? “, Well I went ahead and did some homework (literally a years worth) I joined the movement in January of 2013. I literally felt like a war journalist tagging along with a special military unit for a week in the jungles of Nam. Now don’t get me wrong at no point in time of my journalism was I shot at but I often did come under fire. So what exactly is M.G.T.O.W movement and what exactly does it mean to be a part of it?

Well the M.G.T.O.W movement is basically a group of men that are literally tired of the world they live in. What does this mean? Basically I have complied a rather long list on what has brought so many of the nice guy army into this movement but for the sake of time I’ve toned it down to .  Here are the top  reasons men join M.G.T.O.W:

  • Rules : We’ve all seen it. In today’s age there are so many rules to dating, relationships, marriage, and even how to interact with the opposite sex. While normally I’d think this doesn’t actually make too much sense because any individual that is their own person would totally ignore all these “rules” and just be themselves. However my knowledge in psychology also knows that the average woman is 98% more likely to listen the popular opinion instead of make up their own mind. Yes it’s true look it up.
  • Feminism : This one wasn’t a big surprise but when I spoke to a lot of the married/divorced guys in the group I was shocked.  Over the past few years feminism has definitely stacked the deck against men when it comes to everything from simple interaction with women to marriage. It’s been considered one of the biggest things that have ruined relationships between men and women. There is so much more to talk about with this reason but I have to do it in another post!
  • RE-Education : Men feel that the past and current generations of males have brainwashed by today’s society to be weak, docile, and ultimately controlled by anything in a skirt. This was honestly a shock to the system because I actually felt like everything I taught guys over the years actually paid off! For years I’ve coached guy to be their own individual and it just seemed like they all gathered together here in the M.G.T.O.W camp.
  • Support : Let’s be honest here if you don’t have any support system in your life your kind of S.O.L. The men of M.G.T.O.W are there for you bro. Regardless of what you need help with, it’s gone from dating, to entrepreneurship, to help fixing your blender!  In all honestly I’m impressed with the amount of support members  give to each other.

The Veridct

So nice guys by now you probably have a few questions and to sum them all up it probably translates into “Should I become part of this movement and if so how does it work?” Well guys I will be brutal here. In my time with M.G.T.O.W I can’t say I learned too much that I didn’t already know. However I would say that if you are the type of guy that seriously struggles when it comes to women. I’d strongly suggest you take a look at what a lot of these guys have to say. There are guys that have been through divorces and are helping others get through theirs with incredible expert and accurate advice. I even ended up teaching a lot of the younger crowd about women so they avoid the oh so many mistakes they would of made without the movement involved in their lives.

Also keep in mind while ultimately this is something that would be a healthy addition to any man’s life be warned that supporters of the movement can come under fire by some seriously angry individuals. Will you get into a fist fight? Probably not but you will have your fair share of keyboard warriors that will fight tooth and nail with you online as if they where in a boxing match with Mike Tyson and the stakes where their very lives. One other thing I’d warn new comers about is the fact that it’s difficult in the first few months. The things you’ll learn will be hard to swallow(Just ask Luke), and lots of guys hearing it for the first time can be a little scary. I mean imagine a total stranger telling you everything that’s wrong with you to such a degree you’d swear they have you on a hidden camera somewhere. Yeah it’s that intense, but all in all I’d say give it a shot. Joining is as simple as searching the term online, for those that use reddit it’s even easier “/r/MGTOW“.

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Nice Guys: How (NOT) To Be A Sucker

Happy New Year gang it’s been over a month without any of my witty rants or words of wisdom. So today I figured I’d drop in to let you guys in on something that can ultimately lead to less hassles with the opposite sex. That something is how to refrain from being tagged as a sucker. Now some of you may know exactly what I am talking about and that’s awesome but for the remainder of you that are wondering what exactly constitutes the sucker label I will go into a bit of detail just for you.

What is a sucker?

To be blunt it’s a person that is extremely gullible beyond belief. In fact said person is so easily duped that it may seem like he is mentally deprived…stupid I think they call it. These kinds of guys do anything and everything for a woman’s amusement at their own expense. Why do they do it? Not even I know, but I do know it needs to stop.

Marco writes:

“So I’ve been casually dating this girl who is perhaps out of my league for a couple weeks now. By casual I mean she is upfront to me about seeing other guys (2 others) besides me. We’re not “exclusive”.
Anycase, we haven’t been physical yet…despite me wanting it badly and trying to coax her to bed nearly every night I see her. The more she resists and puts it off the more I want it. But in the meantime she has admitted to me that she has already slept with one of her other usual dates whom she has known for less than a week? How come she slept with him already and not me? She admitted to me that they have sex “a few times a week” but that he’s a “casual date” and not right for her “long term”. Am I being played by a woman? Analyze this situation for me. Would appreciate your opinion.”

Ladies and gentlemen this is a shining example of a sucker. I must say this women must be drop dead gorgeous because if any women told me she was dating two other guys and even slept with one with in 7 days of meeting them. I’d be out the door in less than 30 seconds. I mean call me old fashion or straight edge, but “dating” multiple people is probably the biggest fail anyone can achieve. I’ll rant on this in another post I promise because there are a ton of readers messing around with multiple people right now. You know who you are damn it!

Sucker Rehab

So by now you’ve probably realized that you have a problem or maybe you are in the same situation as Marco here (I pray that you are not). There are a few things that  you will have to stick to and at first it will probably be extremely difficult to do but rest assured I believe in you!

  • Realize you’re an idiot: Yes that might seem incredibly cold but until you realize that you are being a jack ass the sooner you will be on the road to recovery. Sure there might be that one time she genuinely needed help changing her tires, but jogging down to the auto zone and purchasing them is a bit much…
  • Learn to say No: I know you’ve probably watched “Yes Man” a million times and are trying to adopt the philosophy in your life but this is not one of those avenues… When addressed with a outrageous request or situation save yourself the trouble and say NO!
  • Have some standards: No standards means you are desperate and will do anything for the slightest bit of attention from a woman. Don’t be this guy. This is something you’d expect from a 12 year old hitting puberty. You’re a grown ass man, so make sure you have some standards in place to let her know you won’t jump through hoops.
  • Stop viewing women as rare occurrences: Women are everywhere! Hell they out number us in population. Try to realize that they aren’t going to mysteriously disappear if you don’t do stupid things for their enjoyment. Yes large breasts, thighs, ass and vagina are wonderful things. However it’s hardly a rare sight to behold. If it is for you the internet can take care of that in less than a second.

Now don’t think women don’t have this problem as well. They totally do but men seem to do some of the stupidest things you can imagine while in the warm caress of a woman’s attention and most women know this. So they will have their fun when and if they can at your expense. Men have  a habit of just getting in a woman’s pants when the roles are reversed, not that it excuses them from being douche bags either but at least they won’t put you ladies through some incredibly embarrassing situations.

I love women as much as the next guy. I like their company and I like to have intelligent conversations with the pretty ones. However I don’t believe I need to jump through hoops, perform tricks, or exert my manliness to get these things and if I get a hint of needing to do that with specific women I don’t waste my time and neither should you! Take this advice seriously, while I made a few jokes to lighten the mood so to speak doesn’t mean there isn’t any meaning to what I’m saying. Marco already knows the deal, and he is well on his way to being a better nice guy. Till next time guys which will be this month as I want to post a lot more because some of the stories I have to share are awesome in more ways than one.

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Nice Guys: Can Men & Women Be Friends?

 

Hello and welcome to another exciting post. It’s been a few weeks and as many of you that have been keeping up know posts have been a little sporadic due to me working on my home business. Now while that may be my main focus you all know my passions about relationships burns deep. Today I wanted to answer a question asked by young reader in regards to an issue he has with a female “friend”.

Joshua asks:

“I am really great friends with a classmate of mine, and I have started falling in love with her and I am wondering if I should tell her?”

Alright, I want to go ahead and get one thing out of the way immediately. You started falling in love from the moment you first met. I am a guy, I can see through that “I started falling in love.” crap. When it comes to us guys we are either attracted or not. Never will you meet a woman, have no attraction to them and then develop one. Women on the other hand are different. They can actually meet you with no attraction and then develop one later on.

Allow me to break it down for the guys. You meet a woman, you have an attraction, if she isn’t reciprocating then you settle for friendship in hopes of getting something later. This is the case for every single woman you are “friends” with. A woman isn’t a machine where you put kindness coins into until sex falls out! I hate to be black and white, but ask yourself this question.

If your female friend came to you and offered sex would you accept?

Unless you play for the other team (nothing wrong with that by the way) you will accept the offer without question. Men can often be delusional when it comes to having female friends. Do not kid yourself. Female friends are not possible unless you are homosexual, castrated, or have no pulse. If a woman calls you a friend you give her the face. What face? This face

Now when it comes to approaching a women with whom you are attracted, you want to make sure there is some irrefutable proof that there is an interest between you two. I personally like to use what I like to call the “Door” method because it works 100% of the time without seeming like a horn dog.

What the hell is the door method?

Think of the door method as a magic 8 ball. You ask a question and the ball says yes, no, or maybe. It’s just like that except we are removing the maybe part.The door method can be used physically and mentally.

Physically

When you run into your “friend” and they hug you. Examine the way they hug you, for example someone that has absolutely no interest in you will do the “ironing board”. They will bend at the waste keeping their pelvis far from yours, while someone that has some sentiment of attraction to you will have no problem standing closer and hugging for longer periods.

Also keep in mind if this person keeps touching you on the knees, arms, and shoulder. Most women have a habit of constantly touching guys they are attracted to. The more attracted the more touching.

Mentally

This is usually the easiest way to tell if a woman is attracted to you with the least bit of resistances. When engaged in a conversation bring up something that you have an interest in doing (Not Her…) in the near future. Women who have an attraction to you will often reply with an open ended remark so that they can be invited to that thing you are doing.

For example:

You: Man! Have you heard about [Insert New Movie Coming Out Here] next week? I can’t wait to see it!

Her: Oh me too. I really want to see it.

See? She is leaving the door open for an invention from you. If she had no interest in you, chances are she would of told you something negative or generic. Something like “Oh” or “that’s cool”. It’s important to listen to what she says because guys can be a little delusional when it comes to a woman being interested. Just because you carried her bag to class doesn’t mean she wants you in the worst way.

There you have it a simple way to tell if that woman you are chasing secretly want you to pummel her in a fun way without the risk of having your guts ripped out in front of the world…Your welcome.

What do I do if she doesn’t like me?

So you found out she doesn’t like you but you are still stuck on her and you need to make her yours. The best thing you can do is simply stay off her radar for a few weeks or even months. That means no contact, no checking up on her, no nothing. You want to do this for a few reasons.

Firstly you want to let her know you have better things to do. Women actually like guys with their own life. I know I know I’m shocked as well…

Secondly you want to kind of get off her radar. She will want to know what been going on with you after a long hiatus. This gives you the opportunity to kind of reintroduce yourself to her. It’s especially effective if you have gotten in shape or changed your look.

If reintroduction doesn’t work then it’s best to cut your losses and move onward to better and brighter things. What I really want you guys to get though is that you don’t have female friend, only acquaintances! Women do have male friends, but it’s only because they think differently. Good luck out there fellas.

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Nice Guys: Do Supportive Women Exist?

Hello gang, after a month long hiatus on the nice guy blue print (been really busy starting up my business) I wanted to address a serious topic that had me well.. pretty much pissed off the entire afternoon. Now we know the people in the world can be an extremely cruel but what happens when it’s the people you actually rely on most that are the problem? In today’s post I want to address a few questions asked by the countless nice guys out there that are wondering.

“Do supportive women exist and if so where are they?

In my experiences and observations I will say that there are supportive women out there. HOWEVER, there seems to be a rather large catch. As long as your goals, needs, whatever is in line with hers. She will be there. The unfortunate news however is once those goals don’t meet with her lifestyle she may leave you high and dry.

Now of course you have your famous isolated incidents like Mechelle Obama sticking by her husband through thick and thin. However you need to remember we are talking about average women. Women who don’t look at the heart, soul, and dedication you have. They want to know what you can do for them right now as opposed  to what they are willing to stick through. In many professional debates I have almost always heard the women say “I can’t wait for a guy to get his act together.” and for most men that is an instant turn off. It shows selfishness and conceit. No man wants to drop their goals and dreams for a woman who is all about them.

In fact that mentality has cause such a rift between men and women that it’s almost impossible to from a genuine relationship because you don’t really know what the woman is after until she leaves. While I believe true love and real women are out there, I don’t want to kid you guys about your chances of finding it. I’m not saying date every chick that you can, because if you did it would mean you have no idea what you want in a woman. You know what you like, be her friend first and really listen to what she says and watch what she does. It’s very easy to read an individual. Just don’t be distracted by a pretty face, shapely body and sweet demeanor.

Always be yourself, and never be afraid to disagree with a view, opinion, of belief. Not to do so is trying to force yourself to fit into another person’s life and that should happen naturally. If you do this you can easily spot a supportive woman and treat them like they deserve. As for the others…who cares?

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Nice Guys: Is Money The Real Key To A Woman’s Heart?

They say the key to a man’s heart is through his stomach, but is the key to a woman’s heart through your wallet? While some women may find it offensive to assume such a thing. Most if not all men wonder at some point in time of their relationships if they object of their affection only hangs around because of a strong financial base. So today I am going to shed some light on the subject since the question keeps popping up.

The Real Deal…

Sure some women like a good looking guy, most women like a guys that take charge, but all women love a man with money. Before you get ahead of this lesson let me say that a woman’s opinion on financially stable varies depending on the type of lady you are dealing with.

For example a woman that makes twenty grand a year and dates a man whom makes between thirty or forty per year may feel she’s hit the jackpot. Others may feel that’s simply too low.

So your next question is (if you are with someone) “Does she like me because of my income.” I am gonna be blunt and say yes it does play a bigger role than you may think.

Fun Facts…

I know some of the female readers are probably scowling at my entry but I assure you I am only trying to enlighten and educate the nice guys before they end up getting themselves hurt. Now whether or not you agree, you can’t beat scientific studies. The boys over in Austria have done a clinical study on what exactly attracts a woman to a man and this is what they found.

  • Money Can Buy Love : looks, personality, and treatment mean very little to a woman as long as the man has deep pockets. This means if you are the most grotesque creature on the planet but you have money to burn. It turns you into the catch of the day. How is this possible? It’s Magic.
  • Your Car Makes You Look Good: If you own a top of the line vehicle that actually increases you chances of scoring a babe. Yes it’s totally disgusting I know, but it’s a fact.  I couldn’t make this stuff up if I tried.
  • Your Salary Increases Attraction: If your salary exceeds hers, then she will stick around for the long haul. In addition women are more likely to leave a man who has unexpectedly lost hos job. Yup… like rats fleeing a rapidly sinking ship.

All in all, it comes down to your wallet guys. If your pockets aren’t deep enough, you won’t get the time of day unless you have been blatantly lying to get into her pants (Which is pretty low).

Protect Yourself…

By now you are probably wondering exactly how you can filter out the real love interests from the fake ones. While there is no fool proof way to screen potential girlfriends/wives (cause lets face it women are extremely good at lying) I do have a few tips and tricks you can start using from now on to see where her real interests lay.

  1. Don’t Speak Of It: Never speak of your financial situations whether you hit the lotto or the IRS sent you a nasty letter in the mail. Remember you want this woman to get to know you, not your wallet.
  2. Business & Pleasure Don’t Mix: Never speak about what you do, where you do it, and how much you make doing it. If she knows what you do for a living, then she knows how much you make. You don’t want that to be the reason this woman stays or goes.
  3. Keep Financial Documents Hidden: From bonds to ATM receipts. You want to keep those things away from prying eyes, and wondering hands. I myself have caught women sneaking a peek at my ATM receipts since it tells you how much cash you have in your account.
  4. Don’t Be A Wheel Man: If you are riding high, make sure you don’t become an errand boy. In my experiences a lot of women call if they don’t have a ride somewhere. Those types of women should make you sick. Make sure they know there is a lot more to you than a ride.
  5. Keep Family & Friends In The Know: If she can’t get info from you than she will go to friends or family. Inform them that they are never to discuss what you do for a living. EVER. Feel free to tell them the reason, I am sure they will quickly understand.

There you have it guys. The ugly truth that is a key to a woman’s heart, and if I may I’d like to say. If you are a guy that uses money to get with a woman it may be time to wake up and realize that you are being used for your money, your car, and your status. It would probably be easier to have a prostitute in your life, because the risks are pretty much the same in the dating world (go figure huh?). To the ladies, if this is you method of finding Mr.Right I gotta say you should probably change your approach…immediately. Till next time guys.

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Nice Guys: Dealing With A Break Up

Break ups are probably the very bane of the heart. We meet someone, get to know them, develop feelings, think everything is fine, and take our hearts and proceed to the closest and dirtiest trash receptacle. Unfortunately if you where really into the relationship then chances are you are taking it very hard.

Trevor asks:

Ok so me and my girlfriend (ex) of 3 years just broke, up with really no reason, I’m afraid she found someone different, I am so heartbroken it kills me, I’m 18 and shes 19 and what bothers me is the thought of her having sex with someone else, just because of how I knew she acted during sex or the things she said to really make you feel like she loved you…. I feel so broken and need some tips. -Trevor

Trevor believe me when I say I know how awful you must feel currently and I must say if this is someone you consider your true love then there isn’t a whole lot you can really do to erase her from existence. However I will do my best to help you and other readers with some decent tips to not some much get over your ex but to accept that they are gone.

The 5 Steps…

Everyone who goes through a painful break up takes what I like to call rehab. I call it rehab because in essence your ex has become a drug of sorts and now that they supply has run dry you are left to fend for yourself. Here is a brief description of each step.

  • Denial & Isolation: The first stage is always the hardest. You can’t believe shes gone and you don’t want to do anything unless it’s with her which isn’t going to happen unless she some how realizes she made a mistake.
  • Anger & Frustration: Anger usually ensues after you find that they are doing just fine without you or that you simply can’t get the person from your mind. This stage can last months and make you more irritable in general. Basically you might end up flipping a table over because your favorite TV show isn’t coming on…
  • Negotiation: This is a pretty crucial stage. Here is when you start trying to negotiate your way back into your ex’s life so that you can get your “fix”. Unfortunately it is counter productive and can last a few weeks
  • Depression: I know what you are thinking “But I’m already depressed.” Well get ready for even more of it because once negotiations fail then you really start to get down on yourself and hit rock bottom. WARNING: You can get stuck in this stage.
  • Acceptance: The very final step of rehab and the hardest one to get to. However this is the step I will try to get you to (hopefully in less time).

Dealing With It…

One does not simply deal with a break up. One really has to embrace it as it was a long lost brother that they don’t really want to hug but must simply out of formality. Below I have a few rules and guidelines that should help you through the 5 steps in a moderate amount of time without fail. I would say a max of 2 months.

  • Be Sad: Yes, be sad. You just lost someone you care about and if you are going to try and pretend that you don’t give a crap. You will quickly find out that you will have an even harder time getting over her. Take the time to understand your feelings and if someone (even your ex) asks how you are feeling be honest about it. Don’t try and be some sort of tough guy. I’m not saying to cry with snot running down your face or anything but voice your opinion in a neutral manner.
  • Stay Off The Ex Radar: I highly doubt you want to find out that your ex is happy with someone else, so don’t try to look them up, meet with them, or contact them. Yes I know this is extremely difficult but it’s better to leave them in the dark so they can have the opportunity to miss you and realize they let something good go.
  • Hang Out Often: Although you probably don’t feel like being a social butterfly right now, you should probably take the initiative and hang out.I would highly recommend some kind of event that involves a large amount of people. Football games actually work great.
  • Listen To Music: Listening to music can help you get those emotions out of your system. We often have a terrible habit of holding on to what we are feeling without some kind of release. This of course is incredibly unhealthy so much can be a bit of a relief for you.

These are tips and rules I have always used to accept a rather painful break up and I know it won’t steer you wrong. I must insist that you try your best to hang out, and again sporting events are probably one of the best methods.

Heck I will even help you plan ahead! Don’t think about it, just get your hands on some Auburn tigers football tickets , Arkansas razorbacks football tickets , or your personal favorite. Trevor I know you are in Birmingham  so why not go check out the Alabama crimson tide football tickets just to help get your mind off. Hopefully this will help not only Trevor but so many others that are continuing to read along.

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