Category Archives: pregnancy

The Ultimate Man’s Guide To Modern Hypergamy

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It’s no secret men have the damnedest time truly understanding the inner workings of the female psyche. Guys are taught from an early age that being nice, supportive, and friendly will almost certainly land them a faithful mate. However this behavior has only landed the vast majority of men in the category of creep while seemingly opposite behavior actually works. Which leaves nice guys everywhere wondering how exactly does a woman choose her partners. Well my friends we have all the answers in today’s post but first I must warn all who read this. The truth is not pretty, it can be extremely harsh and ultimately painful. Never the less it’s nothing compared to the pain of living a lie for years.

I’d like to introduce you to a term that the uninitiated have probably never heard of, the term is called “Hypergamy”. Hypergamy is defined as the act of marrying someone wealthier or of higher status than yourself. While not gender specific the term is more times than not pointed towards women because status and wealth make up vital parts of their total attraction to males.  Think of hypergamy as a giant tree that every woman must climb, and every branch in that tree represents a male.

New Infographic(1)

  Illustration created with the help of Piktochart

As you can see as a man’s income increases so does the level of attraction from the women he interacts with. However this is only a basic understanding of hypergamy and most guys would dismiss this information without really thinking about it. So to help men truly understand this we will cover this down to it’s core. How and where it starts, your role in it, and even real world examples to learn from.

The Three Pillars of Hypergamy

Modern hypergamy is built on three pillars. One pillar is innate while the other two are taught as young girls mature into women. I’ll let the diagram below explain things more clearly.

three female traits of attract(1)  Illustration created with the help of Piktochart

By now you are probably starting to put two and two together. I can imagine the light bulb turning on as you travel back in time and analyze your past encounters with women. Maybe you realize why you were or weren’t so successful with them in high school. Better yet maybe you realize that those that aren’t up to a woman’s standard are considered creeps, perverts, and potential rapists but this is a topic for another day.

No Place To Go But Up

It’s important to keep in mind that once a woman has climbed to a certain height in the tree she absolutely will not climb down to a lower level. It should also be noted there are women that will do just about anything to secure their branch on that tree. Marriage and children are usually the most effective ways for a woman to secure a portion of wealth for men. When the relationship eventually goes sour the legal system will more often than not give a portion of the man’s wealth to the former wife.

Alimony and child support will keep the woman at their desired standard of living until they find the next eligible suitor. Make no mistake this is not isolated to those that are considered wealthy, this happens to men from all walks of life and levels of income.

Men Ultimately Lose In This System

Many men fall prey to this system and the real kicker is that it’s not widely spoken about. Well no need to fear because I am going to go over three mini case studies of the system at work.  Let’s take a look at our victims:

Dwight Howard: 29 year old profession NBA player. He’s got money, looks, and status which is something every woman is looking for. This man most likely has women throw themselves at him every hour of every day. Unfortunately this man has also managed to spawn 8 children in the span of 6 years between 6 different women. This is not the behavior of a man looking to start a family, this is a man that has been caught in the hypergamy trap…8 times.

Evander Holyfield: 52 year old retired professional boxer. 11 children with 9 different women, again not your typical family man behavior. Although it is the behavior of a wealthy bachelor that just happened to get caught and the reckless behavior has lost him over 300 million.

Calvin Murphy: 66 year old retired NBA player. He has 14 children with 9 different women need I say more here? No on plans to have this many children with so many different women, the amount of legal, alimony, and child support bills must be staggering for this former professional.

I think at this point it’s starting to sink in how the hypergamy system works. The real kicker is the fact these gentlemen are not even married to any of the women they have conceived these children with. This means love and companionship were not a factor and unfortunately that is how it is for most men that get sucked into the system. In a later post I will discuss the adverse effects that modern hypergamy and feminism have on males. Until then readers.

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Nice Guys : Pedestaling & You

Image Credit : zahodi-vgosti.ru

Hello nice guys(and gals), today I have a bit of a treat post for you. Truth be told this subject has been on my mind since last week and I knew instantly that it was going to be my next post’s topic. Today’s topic is about pedestaling, what it is, why you shouldn’t do it and how it changes you for the worse.

We’ve all placed women on a pedestal at some point in time of our lives, but the average nice guy has a terrible tendency to do this on a regular basis. Now I’m not saying it’s wrong to be polite to the opposite sex but that is where you should probably draw the line. In this post I have a strange story of how a nice guy takes putting women on a pedestal to the extreme. His post is rather long so I will be cutting it up for the sake of length.

Our nice guy’s name is Thomas, he’s been married to his wife for five years but as of late things haven’t been all rainbows and sunshine. Thomas says:

Several months ago, we were at a low point in our marriage. I was always busy with work and didn’t spend enough time with her. She felt that we were becoming distant. Many arguments arose and our love in one another felt like it was dwindling. At this time, I had to go away on a business trip for the weekend. My wife was alone at home, with our problems unresolved, and felt empty. She sought to ease the pain with alcohol at a local bar. In a moment of weakness, she had an affair with one of the patrons. Immediately, the next morning, she called me in tears and told me what happened. I felt anger, betrayal, and sorrow, and found myself unable to deal with the situation. I couldn’t talk my precious wife for days.

Immediately, the next morning, she called me in tears and told me what happened. I felt anger, betrayal, and sorrow, and found myself unable to deal with the situation. I couldn’t talk my precious wife for days.At this point, our marriage was greater than it’s ever been. However, a life changing issue has arisen in past two weeks. My wife had been feeling sick and no common medicine seemed to help. As time went by, she began to question if perhaps her ills were a result of a pregnancy. Sure enough, we went to her doctor and he confirmed that my wife was now 9 weeks pregnant. A realization hit the both of us that given the timing, there was no chance that I could be the father. Therefore the pregnancy was the result of my wife’s affair. The news broke her heart, and has left me in a state of depression. Once again, the feelings of anger and betrayal arose, leaving me distant from my wife.

At this point, I’m not sure what to do. Horrible thoughts of divorce and abortion enter my mind every day, and I’m trying my best to suppress them. I have fears that if we have this child together, I might resent him/her. The man my wife had the affair with was African American, while she and I are both Caucasian. This presents another fear as it would be clear to the child that I’m not the true father. How would I explain this to him/her? How would I explain this to others? Many thoughts keep passing through my mind, and I don’t know what to do. I feel alone, both emotionally and spiritually, and am questioning why God has allowed this to happen.”

Now dealing with a cheating partner is never easy, and it’s especially difficult being a nice guy. After reading Tom’s plea I can’t help but think he has this woman on a pedestal and no matter what she does wrong he can’t seem to knock her off. Notice how Tom seems to blame himself for his wife’s actions, and down right says he has no right to judge her! The reason I’m choosing Tom’s story is not because it’s the worst I’ve ever seen but the least extreme.

This poor guy is essentially apologizing for something his wife did to him and blaming it on everyone except the person who did the wrong doing. This is the end result of pedestaling guys, it completely destroys your perception and makes you lose focus of what’s going on around you. Let’s break down the effects to be clear guys.

The Causes:

What causes a guy to literally go blind(love is blind? see what I did there?) when in the presence of a woman? Great question, here are a few  answers.

  • Because you mom said so: In today’s world most parent/s teach their men in training to  always respect women and be nice to them.
  • Reward: For some strange reason nice guys think that if they trip over themselves with the sole purpose of making a woman happy that it will some how land them together. Guys it’s a lot more complicated than that and I promise in another post I’ll break it down for you.
  • Attention: Nice guys hate being ignored by someone that they like. It makes them sad, depressed, and mad at the world. They will do anything to get rid of those feelings.

The Effects:

  • She can’t do anything wrong: Having a woman on a pedestal makes you paint them in a perfect light, so perfect in fact that if she did anything wrong it wouldn’t even register in your brain. Enter Tom…
  • You are no longer important: You stop looking out for number one, and just look after her. Again this makes you lose focus on what is really going on in your relationship. Tom again…
  • Everything is your fault: If she leaves you or hooks up with someone else. Some how it turns out to be your fault and your fault alone.

In conclusion guys you really need to step back and see if you have adopted any of the symptoms above and if you have you seriously need to reverse the process before you end up like Thomas. A middle aged man that has been married to a wife that had an affair and is carrying a baby that isn’t his. Somewhere in Tom’s mind she didn’t do anything wrong, and he has no right to judge her. Nice guys this is your fate if you don’t stop putting women you are attracted to on a pedestal. Stay tuned for net week’s post as always comments, questions, complaints, concerns, and confessions are welcome!

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Nice Guys: Men Who Are Door Mats

Guys, I am going to be honest. I’m a little bit pissed off right now. I came across a gentleman with a very serious quandary. To make a very long story short, this man has been married for a relatively short time (he did not specify) and has been having problems with his jealousy towards his wife’s past. Now this man’s wife is a bit of a…”Free Spirit”.

I’m not gonna sugar coat it, this woman has been around the block a few times. Which keep in mind guys is one of the biggest red flags that can ever slap you in the face. Any way, prior to hooking up with him this woman has slept with two guys in the span of 48 hours then adding him to the list with in less than 7 days.

They move in together, get a big place to prepare for the baby(Oh yeah…she is pregnant too). Until one day he comes home early to find his wife locked in the bed room with another man. Now at this point in time I would have left them both out on the street with the guy laying right on his ass! However our nice guy decided he would wait till the stranger left his house to talk to his wife.  WHAT!? If that wasn’t bad enough she refused to tell him who the guy was. Now he wants to know how to get past this incident and move on. Then it occurred to me…this guy is your typical full fledged door mat!

The Traits Of A Door Mat:

Just reading this question pissed me off to the point where I had to address this issue amongst anyone who reads the Nice Guy Blue Print regularly or happens across it in the future. If you have the majority of the traits that I am about to list, you are a freaking door mat and need to start changing things around for yourself.

  • Lack Of Self Worth: If you are one of those types of people that feel that you have nothing to genuinely offer the world. Chances are you will bow down to people you feel that do.
  • Extremely Passive: If you are the type of person to avoid any and all confrontation. I am not saying arguing is the best thing in the world, because I hate arguing…over stupid things in general. However If someone oh I dunno  screws your wife in your house you have a God given right to whip somebody’s ass!
  • You Won’t Stand Up For Yourself: If you find yourself backing down from situations even those that you are clearly in the right. You might want to wipe the mud off your shirt because you are being stepped on.
  • You Try To Please Everyone: You bust your ass day in and day out trying to make sure you please everyone around you even if they do not deserve it.

These are the average traits of what I like to call a door mat and if you even have one of these habits there is a good chance you are putting up with too much Bull in your waking life.  In the next post I will go ahead and show some ways to break out of these habits and start reclaiming some dignity. I have already instructed our poor nice guy on the next steps, but I am a little doubtful that he will stand up to his wife.  Time will tell.

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Nice Guys: Should You Be Promiscuous?

Having sex with a bunch of different women sounds like a dream come true and for many men it is, but is it really all it’s cracked up to be?

Sex is a very important part of life in many ways. It keeps the human race going, it’s great exercise, it connects up deeply to those we love.

However times have changed dramatically. Today sex has become to many individuals a pass time, a hobby, competition,etc. If you have a penis there is a good chance you’ve contemplated whether or not you should free your sexual inhibitions and lead a more promiscuous lifestyle.

In my experience I have juggled this thought in my mind for years and thought I have come close many times to simply saying “Fuck it”. My morale compass has always brought me to deciding against going through with it. It all comes down to whether or not you see it as an important act that will change your life. I have turned down 98% of sexual advances and have been heavily criticized for it by my male peers.

Unlike most guys, My brain doesn’t shut down at the sight of a great pair of breasts and a firm round ass. It actually does the very opposite by bringing up what I like to call “The List”. Allow me to walk you through it.

  • Do you trust this woman: I learned at a very young age the term DTA: Don’t Trust Anybody (Forward to 2:45 in the video). Most of these encounters have been with strangers/co workers and they have done nothing to make me trust them in any way.
  • Could you have children with this women : It’s one thing to be a father(which I will be a great one) but to be a father with a woman you have absolutely zero interest in is a life of misery in my opinion.
  • How many men do you think she has done this to: This one is critical because I would be a complete jack ass to believe this is the very first time any of the women in these encounters decided to be so blunt in their requests.
  • Is she clean:An intuitive guy can spot a dirty female a mile away. Her appearance, mannerisms, etc are dead giveaways.
  • Does she have kids: It may seem screwed up, but the truth is a single mom that is trying to get in your pants is not exactly the type of person that has her priorities in order. Yes everyone deserves love and all but I have my standards and so should you.

All of this runs through my mind in less than 5 seconds, and if the results are not satisfactory sex is pretty much a no go. The truth is I value not only myself, but the person in question and sex itself. Yes I have and will miss out on countless opportunities and it would bother me if sex actually ruled my world.

While it’s true that we only live once. I would have to say I would like to live without as many regrets as possible. I can’t take back STD’s, children, and all the other hazards that come with being a promiscuous man so I simply choose not to.

What you do is ultimately up to you. I can’t say I recommend the life style but if you decide to participate do it as safely as humanly possible. Keep protection with you at ALL times, never be caught without it. Get yourself test after every encounter, it’s one thing to have something but it’s another thing to ruin someone else life because you didn’t know you where infected.