Monthly Archives: October 2012

Nice Guys: Can Men & Women Be Friends?

 

Hello and welcome to another exciting post. It’s been a few weeks and as many of you that have been keeping up know posts have been a little sporadic due to me working on my home business. Now while that may be my main focus you all know my passions about relationships burns deep. Today I wanted to answer a question asked by young reader in regards to an issue he has with a female “friend”.

Joshua asks:

“I am really great friends with a classmate of mine, and I have started falling in love with her and I am wondering if I should tell her?”

Alright, I want to go ahead and get one thing out of the way immediately. You started falling in love from the moment you first met. I am a guy, I can see through that “I started falling in love.” crap. When it comes to us guys we are either attracted or not. Never will you meet a woman, have no attraction to them and then develop one. Women on the other hand are different. They can actually meet you with no attraction and then develop one later on.

Allow me to break it down for the guys. You meet a woman, you have an attraction, if she isn’t reciprocating then you settle for friendship in hopes of getting something later. This is the case for every single woman you are “friends” with. A woman isn’t a machine where you put kindness coins into until sex falls out! I hate to be black and white, but ask yourself this question.

If your female friend came to you and offered sex would you accept?

Unless you play for the other team (nothing wrong with that by the way) you will accept the offer without question. Men can often be delusional when it comes to having female friends. Do not kid yourself. Female friends are not possible unless you are homosexual, castrated, or have no pulse. If a woman calls you a friend you give her the face. What face? This face

Now when it comes to approaching a women with whom you are attracted, you want to make sure there is some irrefutable proof that there is an interest between you two. I personally like to use what I like to call the “Door” method because it works 100% of the time without seeming like a horn dog.

What the hell is the door method?

Think of the door method as a magic 8 ball. You ask a question and the ball says yes, no, or maybe. It’s just like that except we are removing the maybe part.The door method can be used physically and mentally.

Physically

When you run into your “friend” and they hug you. Examine the way they hug you, for example someone that has absolutely no interest in you will do the “ironing board”. They will bend at the waste keeping their pelvis far from yours, while someone that has some sentiment of attraction to you will have no problem standing closer and hugging for longer periods.

Also keep in mind if this person keeps touching you on the knees, arms, and shoulder. Most women have a habit of constantly touching guys they are attracted to. The more attracted the more touching.

Mentally

This is usually the easiest way to tell if a woman is attracted to you with the least bit of resistances. When engaged in a conversation bring up something that you have an interest in doing (Not Her…) in the near future. Women who have an attraction to you will often reply with an open ended remark so that they can be invited to that thing you are doing.

For example:

You: Man! Have you heard about [Insert New Movie Coming Out Here] next week? I can’t wait to see it!

Her: Oh me too. I really want to see it.

See? She is leaving the door open for an invention from you. If she had no interest in you, chances are she would of told you something negative or generic. Something like “Oh” or “that’s cool”. It’s important to listen to what she says because guys can be a little delusional when it comes to a woman being interested. Just because you carried her bag to class doesn’t mean she wants you in the worst way.

There you have it a simple way to tell if that woman you are chasing secretly want you to pummel her in a fun way without the risk of having your guts ripped out in front of the world…Your welcome.

What do I do if she doesn’t like me?

So you found out she doesn’t like you but you are still stuck on her and you need to make her yours. The best thing you can do is simply stay off her radar for a few weeks or even months. That means no contact, no checking up on her, no nothing. You want to do this for a few reasons.

Firstly you want to let her know you have better things to do. Women actually like guys with their own life. I know I know I’m shocked as well…

Secondly you want to kind of get off her radar. She will want to know what been going on with you after a long hiatus. This gives you the opportunity to kind of reintroduce yourself to her. It’s especially effective if you have gotten in shape or changed your look.

If reintroduction doesn’t work then it’s best to cut your losses and move onward to better and brighter things. What I really want you guys to get though is that you don’t have female friend, only acquaintances! Women do have male friends, but it’s only because they think differently. Good luck out there fellas.

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